I keep saying that one day I’ll finally write a first blog post here,
in this space I designated over a year ago to be my little personal blog space but was too busy, too scared, too drained, and too intimidated to write in.
It would be a new blogger, a new tumblr, a new livejournal, a new xanga—it’s a new space, but it’s also old hat for me: a public diary where I’m unabashedly my emotional, overanalytical self, where I say too much and feel too much and allow my sensitive and sometimes dramatic innards to splay brightly across the screen, in hopes that maybe any small part of the jumble inside my head and heart will resonate with someone who comes across it.
This website is my professional website, and I am a consummate professional (ask me about my references!), but I am also a wild, delicate, thoughtful, intuitive, empathetic, impassioned human, and I don’t think the two are mutually exclusive. In fact, I want my professional and personal lives to intertwine and overlap and create meaning that echoes back and forth because I believe in a holistic life and self, and I’ve spent the last few years trying to figure out how to do just that. So if I scare you off, if you think I’m too much, if you think vulnerability and talking about feelings aren’t worthwhile … well, it probably wasn’t a great fit, anyway.
Over the course of the pandemic thus far, I’ve seen just how many people appreciate self-disclosure, honesty, and vulnerability—how much people need it. How much people are dying for someone to volunteer it, to give them permission to say the thing weighing on their heart, to point to the dark cloud around their shoulders, to cry without apologizing for it. And I always joke that I don’t mind being the crazy lady who raises her hand first; someone’s gotta start the kumbaya circle, right?
So, here we go. Here I go. Here’s that first blog post. Let’s see what happens, yeah?